I know a mother who was so enamored with multivitamins, “enhancement” pills, “optimized” water, and all those weird stuffs they sold through a multi-level marketing champaign, up to a point where she was genuinely believes, and had solidified her faith in the merit of these medications. Not that I had anything against it, really, but I had always believed that medications did nothing but spoiled our natural immunity. That is why I’m rarely if ever, took a medication unless I really, really have to. Even when I was sick. I guess to each, his own.
Though I had no doubt that the general masses would find this film quite adequate, perhaps more than just adequate, exciting, and never threaten to bore, I was so impatient with it. The overly stylish visual grandeur, while at times are pretty nice, were just no more of a petty hindrance which probably more at home in a music video rather than a blockbuster cinema such as this. But don’t listen to me. I just can’t sympathize enough with the main character that I just can’t stay too long on his side. Thus, my impatience, and largely why, for me, this film is a bore.
Or maybe I’m just too envious of him.
During one of his narration, the character asked us about “what would you do?” given the choice of taking a yet unproven nor registered drug for an exchange of a generally, nay, an ultimately better life that I think no sane people would say ‘no’ to. Perhaps it was because that I had begrudgingly answered ‘yes’ to his question and as the result, my consciousness had immediately hated myself for giving that answer. And therefore, it matures into envy, that leads to my inability to sympathisize with his cause.
When I left my previous job, one of my colleague says that the organization had lost another ‘idealist’ character. I’d say naive, but you get the idea. I’m still lending my ear to what my consciousness, driven by my moral values, had said. Most of the time. In fact, the only reason I had left my previous job is because my moral values stated that I need to do a real work, and not just pretending to have one. And if that doesn’t shown you my naiviety, then I don’t know what else.
However, the film, for me, is a reminder that I’d still ignored my moral values if the price is right. I’d still give in to temptation, if it was juicy enough, foregoing everything I held dear. Values? Kiss my ass. Moral? Go hang yourself. I’d still take that clear pill and gulp it down one last time.
And so, I’m not as ‘pure’ as I’ve always believed, after all.